If you had 2 months to live what would you do ...?

[hulk181man]

Not trying to bring everyone down, but think about it. I bring it up because my wife's sister-in-law was diagnosed with terminal cancer a week ago. My wife, being an only daughter with 5 brothers is very close to her.

One doc told her to just have fun -- which I imagine would be my approach....never really thought about it. Another doc said, she might have up to a couple years but I guess the cancer is already widespread. Personally, I like to think I'd get mad as hell and fight it for all it's worth.

But 2 months, damn! Would you even bother with reading comics at that point? If a story you enjoy is nearing conclusion would you write the creators and inquire about the ending....would you care? I guess it's what we call perspective.

Anyway, maybe somebody has good advice on final things to do. If so, I might pass some ideas on to her.

[tcolli]

Hulk, sorry to hear about your wife's sister in law. You both have my sympathy. Its tough, my wifes mother just passed away from cancer this Jan and we took it pretty hard (she the worst as you could imagine). Mostly, I would spend alot of time with family and live life to the fullest if possible.

[X-O HoboJoe]

I would laugh as much as possible. I see surviviors every day (some who were classifed "terminal" years ago and are in remission; rare, but does happen.) and the one thing they all seem to have it a damn good sense of humor.

[mrwoogieman]

Not trying to bring everyone down, but think about it. I bring it up because my wife's sister-in-law was diagnosed with terminal cancer a week ago. My wife, being an only daughter with 5 brothers is very close to her.

One doc told her to just have fun -- which I imagine would be my approach....never really thought about it. Another doc said, she might have up to a couple years but I guess the cancer is already widespread. Personally, I like to think I'd get mad as hell and fight it for all it's worth.

But 2 months, damn! Would you even bother with reading comics at that point? If a story you enjoy is nearing conclusion would you write the creators and inquire about the ending....would you care? I guess it's what we call perspective.

Anyway, maybe somebody has good advice on final things to do. If so, I might pass some ideas on to her.

That's terrible, does she have kids? If so, I would suggest she get a video camera and tape a few things she'd like to pass along to her kids, doesn't have to be long or inspirational, just something from the heart for each of them.

Oh, and make a will, if she hasn't already, and decide who gets what if there are family heirlooms or special jewlery. This would go a long way to keeping the family peace after she's gone.

[Redtrax]

My sympathies go out to you and your family.
I had a somewhat similar experience a couple of months ago.
Late last year my father (55yo) was also diagnosed with terminal cancer, lung cancer, after a long period of tests.
The estimate was that would have about a year without therapy and some months longer with chemo.
Unfortunately, he and we weren't granted that much time
Just two months later, his health went downhill very quickly and he passed away the day after valentine's...

Though it shook all of us very hard, my mother, brother and me are gratefull that we still had some time to say our goodbyes

I don't really know what to suggest what you should do in the remaining time, but what we did was spend as much time together as we could and try not to all humor even in these kind of times.

Best of luck to you and your family, don't refrain from sending me a pm if you want to know anything.

[Mozz]

Sorry to hear that man. There's a lot of people out there who've had family in these situations (I myself included - losing my grandmother a couple years back).

If it was me, and I know this sounds kind of corny, but I'd track down my "girl that got away". Someone I cared deeply for but never told her (it's been 7 years and I still think of her). It doesn't really apply. I guess it's just telling your loved ones how much you care for them.

[myron]

my father in law was diagnosed with terminal cancer and told by his Oncologist to get his Sh!t in order, that he had 6 weeks.

He didn't like that (said he had to much to do yet)...so he found other doctors...tried traditional and non-traditional treatments...he found the Cancer Treatment Center in Zion to be a great place...wound up living for 3.5 more years...enough time to spend more time with family and get things straight...he was probably the most positive person I ever met. Gotta think positive otherwise depression could get you before the cancer...

[Redtrax]

my father in law was diagnosed with terminal cancer and told by his Oncologist to get his Sh!t in order, that he had 6 weeks.

He didn't like that (said he had to much to do yet)...so he found other doctors...tried traditional and non-traditional treatments...he found the Cancer Treatment Center in Zion to be a great place...wound up living for 3.5 more years...enough time to spend more time with family and get things straight...he was probably the most positive person I ever met. Gotta think positive otherwise depression could get you before the cancer...

Absolutely agree with you on that, however, as in my father's case, that doesn't always help (much).

[X-O HoboJoe]

my father in law was diagnosed with terminal cancer and told by his Oncologist to get his Sh!t in order, that he had 6 weeks.

He didn't like that (said he had to much to do yet)...so he found other doctors...tried traditional and non-traditional treatments...he found the Cancer Treatment Center in Zion to be a great place...wound up living for 3.5 more years...enough time to spend more time with family and get things straight...he was probably the most positive person I ever met. Gotta think positive otherwise depression could get you before the cancer...

Absolutely agree with you on that, however, as in my father's case, that doesn't always help (much).

He was with those he loved in his last days; he was better off than most of us are everyday. Not sure if it extended his life, but it sounds like your family made the best of what time there was.

[jedimarley]

Dave,
I would just LIVE!
Don't worry.
Just LIVE.

[hulk181man]

Hey guys, thanks for all the responses. Some real thoughtful ideas here, including the video & letter suggestions.

When something like this comes up you tend to forget that many people, if not everyone experiences similar situations at some point in their lives.

My wife and I spent last evening visiting Karen and she looked well and in good spirits - although sometimes I think she puts up a front so my wife doesn't worry so much. She's going to try both alternative treatments and traditional methods and hope for the best. We're going to spend as much time with her as we can, and take some trips together if she's up to it. I hope that when the fall season rolls around again I can put a post on here to tell you that she's still with us, and then again at Christmas, etc. Again, thanks.

Dave

[jedimarley]

[Unblessed]

hmm...

Well, I'd cash in some retirement crap (sell my car back to dealer for quick cash, cash in my CD), take the penalties and tour the world*. Eventually to end up on a tropical beach.

I want to die in my sleep on a tropical beach, preferably the island of Kuai in Hawaii. Rather not have my final days of life be in a hospital.

*Tour of the world*
Ruins in Mexico and Peru
See the Cuba
See Europe
Safari in Africa
Visit China (Great Wall, Forbidden City)
End in Hawaii

Just some ideas.

~The Unblessed Soul

[SolarFan777]

Hey Dave so sorry to hear that...

Like someone said earlier though I know people with cancer that were "written off" and lived for years beyond the time they were given.

Live it to the fullest and make everyday count. No matter what you do with the time... never, ever give up!

[GGSAE]

I'm sorry to hear about your loss, why is it always tragedy that makes us appreciate the finer and simpler things of life? I like unblessed's idea, go somewhere you've always wanted to be, just live it.